Phase II, Day 8--going Primal

I have been having a really tough time with eating.  Not so much eating to excess because I have my moments, but generally, I am doing pretty good.  It is about eating the precise things.  Like when I was a vegetarian, I gave up meat for over two years.  No meat.  Nada.  Zilch!  But giving up grains as suggested in the Primal Blueprint diet, is a condition I am not prepared to do.  

I want to do the Primal Blueprint.  The concept is amazingly simple--no grains, eat proteins like meat and nuts, and fruits and veggies.  The struggle comes from undoing all the "conventional wisdom" of eating a mix of carbs, protein, and fats.  We learned about the food pyramid, and now there is a USDA food plate.  There are so many concepts in "what to eat" out there that I am getting confused about which would work best for me.

This morning, I worked out to Ripped in 30, and am at Level 2 for the second 30 day stretch.  I've exercised 38 days straight.  I feel great.  I feel so strong and capable of kicking rear.  I see the subtle changes to my body.  I love my strong legs and my arms are getting more tone.  The issue is my inability to figure out a consistent eating plan, which will give me more noticeable results.  When I sacrifice a food group, I start feeling deprived and bitter.  I like eating salads, but having too many of those in the last two months left me yearning for something more.  And that is where the "carb monster" creeps in.  

As a Latina, my culture loves white rice.  As a first generation American, I grew up on cereals and sandwiches too.  I can live without pasta and bread, but heck, I need rice with my meal and a cookie every once in a while.  I understand that the Primal Blueprint will eventually make me not crave that darn sugar, but I can't help but feel deprived without yet "depriving myself."

I had a good breakfast this morning--soy, blueberry yogurt with sesame seeds and a banana.  A simple Primal breakfast.  It would have been better had it not been soy, but what can you do?  Feeling full enough, but not stuffed, I plan on getting a salad with chicken for lunch.  I have grapes for snack.  Life is good.  But life gets in the way by the middle of the afternoon and when I start thinking about what to make for dinner for those in the house who do not go Primal.  

The kids asked for Tacos tonight.  I can make Primal Tacos for me.  It can be as simple as cutting the veggies and using whole romaine lettuce leaves for my soft shell.  I hide carrots and red peppers in the meat to make sure my kids get veggies.  But when I exclude the flour tortilla shell, I start to feel deprived.  Why do the kids get to eat the soft white fluffiness of the tortilla?  Why didn't I ever look like my 9-year-old who can eat anything and still have a gymnast body without the gymnastics?  Why is biology and genetics cruel?

My therapist (yes, I've been seeing a therapist for a couple of months now--she deals with food addiction) said I need to write in a journal--not a food list, but the feelings.  When I want food, what am I truly feeling?  She understands that it is another thing to add to my [life] plate, but I need to work through my issues with food.  Why am I resisting making better choices, which will bring me the "happiness" that I am seeking? Okay, "happiness" may not be the word . . . maybe, the word is satisfaction.  I want to be satisfied with myself--satisfied with my physical appearance.  

I guess what I should do is do a Primal Blueprint challenge--starting today, even though Halloween is Monday and Nana's birthday (with cake) is tomorrow.  I started the day off right with breakfast.  I just have to apply that for a week, then keep going to two and so on.  It works for my workouts, and I am sure it will work for eating.  

Have you ever done a no grains (carbs) diet?  How successful were you?  

Phase II, Day 1

My goal is to eat more of this than grains or sugar.

I did it!  I finished Phase I of my 30 days of Jillian Michaels' DVDs.  To recap: Phase I required alternating Ripped in 30 (RI30), 30 Day Shred (30DS), 6 Week 6 Pack (6W6P) everyday until I completed 30 days of consistent exercise.  I started with Ripped in 30, Level 1 using 3 lb hand weights.  The next day I used 30 Day Shred, Level 1 with 3 lb weights.  This went on for a week. I started with the modifiers for many of the moves because I wasn't very fit when I started.  I had been working out intermittently, but not by any stretch of the imagination was I fit.  Every 7 days, I went up a Level.  The fourth week, for Level 4, I alternated working out with RI30 (which has a Level 4) and 6W6P, Level 1 to really strengthen my core.  I've lost 10 lbs.

After each DVD workout, I would then supplement with 20-30 minutes of cardio on either my treadmill or spin bike.  Within the last week, I started jogging lightly on the treadmill to increase my endurance.  There were about 3 days within the 30 days that I had to miss the supplemental cardio because I either worked out too late in the evening than my usual 5 a.m. workout, or I hit snooze too many times at 4:45 a.m. and had only time to do the DVD and get the kids up for school.  Let's be clear about the actual time of the workouts.  The DVD cover and Jillian says each level is a 20 minute workout, but my DVD's analog time line and heart rate monitor clocked in over 30 minutes: often reaching 36 minutes of actual activity, from warm up to cool down.  I finished Phase I on Thursday, October 20.

This morning, I started Phase II of another 30 days of Jillian Michaels' DVDs.  Phase II had me starting again with RI30, Level 1.  The difference is that I increased my weights to 5 lbs, and did less modifications.  Well, whose kidding who, I did modify the pushups because I am not there . . . yet!  But I didn't modify the plank.  I won't be modifying the plyometric plank routines that Jillian loves to torture us with.  She admits it.  It is torture.  I then hopped on the treadmill for a 20 minute walk/run.  

In the opening of the the DVDs, Jillian talks about taking a rest day.  I want to put my thoughts out there on that one.  There are many people who do heavy manual labor daily: from ranch work (those animals don't feed, steer, or clean themselves) to housework.  We should be in constant movement daily.  I work a sedentary job that keeps me sitting 7 hours in my day.  On the days that my body wasn't initially up to the task of working out hard, I modified the routine.  I didn't jump so high.  I didn't squat so low, I didn't plank full body and went onto my knees.  I am not sore in places that Jillian makes us target.  I have that good sore where I know my muscles are getting stronger.  My knees don't hurt.  Besides from plantar fasciitis that I had prior to the routine, I am okay.  

This is how I feel:  I feel stronger.  I feel energetic.  I feel that I have more endurance.  My anxiety level has decreased.  I am working through many of the emotional issues that I've been dealing with for over 8 years.  I have goals and challenges that I finally want to accomplish.  I have an action plan and am unwaivering in it.  I am in a better place in every sense of the word than I was 30 days ago.  

Working out everyday has led to better habits.  I moved my parking ramp to one farther away.  Not only do I save money, but I have to walk up and down stairs and walk farther to and from work.  I am making better choices (with the exception of 3 days of binging while on my period).  

My eating goal for Phase II is encouraging better eating habits.  In Phase I, I tried to eat more fruits and veggies with lean meats and less carbs.  But I am an addict of sugar: breads, pastas, rice, and sweets.  I am trying to break that habit.  I started reviewing the Primal Blueprint lifestyle.  Many of the things I was doing for 30 days incorporated what I've been reading for the last two days.  Workout less strenously (and I think I am with Jillian's workouts) and eat more veggies, fruits and lean meats and no grains.  The tough part is my addiction to oatmeal for breakfast.  I have to work on making more non grain choices.  I have to plan the eating part of Phase II.  I have to prepare foods in advance.  This is work.  This is a commitment.  I didn't have that when I first started this blog.  I was focused on exercising to eat.  Now, I am focused on exercising and eating well so I can live a better life.  I am trying my damndest to make sure that if I get Alzheimers, like my mother, that I get it much later in life than she did.  I am not accepting that fate.  

My weight loss goal for Phase II is to lose 10 lbs, which will finally get me under 200 and closer to my goal of 150.  While I've seen a dramatic difference in my jeans, I want to get to my happy weight.  Eating well will make the difference.  With creating my own salad bar in my refrigerator, choosing lean meats, and good fats, and being consistent with applying all of it on a daily basis, I think it will make the difference.  

When you think about "happy weight" what does that look like for you?

Workout Zone-Day 19, Phase I; 11 to go.

From October 9, 2011

I've been working out for 19 days straight.  I've been doing 30 Day Shred or Ripped In 30 on alternate days. I use my spin bike or my treadmill depending on the day.  This is my "dungeon".  It is the utility room in my new home.  It is all concrete, exposed pipes, beams, and electrical and cable wires.  Behind my workout zone is the furnace and the hot water heater.  Both alternate to keep a constant hum while trying to listen to Jillian's directions.

From October 9, 2011

I've been enjoying the challenge of 30 Day routines.  I've planned a three Phase routine.  I am presently in Phase I, which is 30 days of RI30 or 30DS.  Right now, I am in Level 3.  I just bought 6 Week, 6 Pack to ad for Level 4 of RI30.  Phase I requires me to use 3 lb weights.  I've also been doing a lot of modifications due to plantar fasciitis.  My right foot is killing me.  I don't think it is just the exercise.  It is the heaviness in my body.  I shouldn't be in  so much pain and discomfort at 37-years-old.  Advil is my friend.

From October 9, 2011

Hubby created a TV zone with left over TVs.  These used to be the children's nursery TVs when they were nursing, I would use them to watch TV in the middle of the night.  TVs came out in preschool.  Now, they are my morning news TV while on the machines.  The other is my DVD TV for all those DVDs you see beside it. I'm very happy that he did this for me.  It would have been his man cave, but I appreciate that he did this for me.

From October 9, 2011

Here are my DVDs.  I don't love them all.  I would say that the top four are my go to videos for right now.  Phase II and III will still require me to use Jillian's videos.  I've been trying to incorporate Yoga, but there aren't enough hours in the day or enough energy coursing through my body to give me the physical motivation to get a second workout done in my day.  I usually work out at 5 a.m., unless it is the weekend and will do it much later.

Eating:  Not so great lately.  I am stressed and overwhelmed.  I am still trying to reduce the white carbs, but I eat what I have available.  I've been making a lot of salads with a variety of raw veggies: cabbage, beets, broccoli, carrots, and lettuces.  Wishing I could do better with lean meats, but I will work harder.

Weight Loss:  I've lost almost 10 lbs.  However, my poor eating these last few days has me gaining 3 lbs and I feel a tad bloated with my cycle coming soon.  I am trying to get to 199 lbs.  I am tired of being over 200.  I feel like I can't get out of this number.  I am hopeful that I will get to 199 by the end of Phase I; in 11 days.

Today, I watched a marathon of MTV's "I Used To Be Fat."  Teenagers losing weight the summer before college.  It has taken me back to my teenage years.  My mom was so unsupportive of weight loss.  She was very controlling over my safety and refused to let me exercise outside of the house or join a team.  Many of the parents on the show were similarly unsupportive.  Having my mother living with me has me feeling like I am 16 again.  It is not her fault.  I am an adult that makes choices, but sometimes your sixteen-year-old self makes a long term appearance.  

Where do you work out?  What is your ideal workout zone?