Phase II, Day 8--going Primal

I have been having a really tough time with eating.  Not so much eating to excess because I have my moments, but generally, I am doing pretty good.  It is about eating the precise things.  Like when I was a vegetarian, I gave up meat for over two years.  No meat.  Nada.  Zilch!  But giving up grains as suggested in the Primal Blueprint diet, is a condition I am not prepared to do.  

I want to do the Primal Blueprint.  The concept is amazingly simple--no grains, eat proteins like meat and nuts, and fruits and veggies.  The struggle comes from undoing all the "conventional wisdom" of eating a mix of carbs, protein, and fats.  We learned about the food pyramid, and now there is a USDA food plate.  There are so many concepts in "what to eat" out there that I am getting confused about which would work best for me.

This morning, I worked out to Ripped in 30, and am at Level 2 for the second 30 day stretch.  I've exercised 38 days straight.  I feel great.  I feel so strong and capable of kicking rear.  I see the subtle changes to my body.  I love my strong legs and my arms are getting more tone.  The issue is my inability to figure out a consistent eating plan, which will give me more noticeable results.  When I sacrifice a food group, I start feeling deprived and bitter.  I like eating salads, but having too many of those in the last two months left me yearning for something more.  And that is where the "carb monster" creeps in.  

As a Latina, my culture loves white rice.  As a first generation American, I grew up on cereals and sandwiches too.  I can live without pasta and bread, but heck, I need rice with my meal and a cookie every once in a while.  I understand that the Primal Blueprint will eventually make me not crave that darn sugar, but I can't help but feel deprived without yet "depriving myself."

I had a good breakfast this morning--soy, blueberry yogurt with sesame seeds and a banana.  A simple Primal breakfast.  It would have been better had it not been soy, but what can you do?  Feeling full enough, but not stuffed, I plan on getting a salad with chicken for lunch.  I have grapes for snack.  Life is good.  But life gets in the way by the middle of the afternoon and when I start thinking about what to make for dinner for those in the house who do not go Primal.  

The kids asked for Tacos tonight.  I can make Primal Tacos for me.  It can be as simple as cutting the veggies and using whole romaine lettuce leaves for my soft shell.  I hide carrots and red peppers in the meat to make sure my kids get veggies.  But when I exclude the flour tortilla shell, I start to feel deprived.  Why do the kids get to eat the soft white fluffiness of the tortilla?  Why didn't I ever look like my 9-year-old who can eat anything and still have a gymnast body without the gymnastics?  Why is biology and genetics cruel?

My therapist (yes, I've been seeing a therapist for a couple of months now--she deals with food addiction) said I need to write in a journal--not a food list, but the feelings.  When I want food, what am I truly feeling?  She understands that it is another thing to add to my [life] plate, but I need to work through my issues with food.  Why am I resisting making better choices, which will bring me the "happiness" that I am seeking? Okay, "happiness" may not be the word . . . maybe, the word is satisfaction.  I want to be satisfied with myself--satisfied with my physical appearance.  

I guess what I should do is do a Primal Blueprint challenge--starting today, even though Halloween is Monday and Nana's birthday (with cake) is tomorrow.  I started the day off right with breakfast.  I just have to apply that for a week, then keep going to two and so on.  It works for my workouts, and I am sure it will work for eating.  

Have you ever done a no grains (carbs) diet?  How successful were you?