Nurturing

 

My son had his adenoids and tonsils removed on Wednesday.  They were extremely enlarged and they interfered with his sleep, and part of me thinks it is related with his mild autism spectrum diagnosis.  I've been home since then, and have been intermittently doing chores while forcing him to drink as much fluid as he can tolerate.  There have been two days of taking care of him in the night.  Last night, he woke up at 3 a.m. and kept running to the bathroom because the antibiotic gave him a terrible stomach ache and diarrhea.

Last night, after putting all three kids to bed, I played a DVR'd episode of Oprah in which she was speaking to Geneen Roth, the author of Women Food And God.  Everything they'd discussed was something that I knew, but had completely ignored.  My eating is a reflection of my emotions; hence the title of this blog.  I have an inkling as to why, when, and how I stuff my feelings. 

These two days at home taking care of my boy and still recovering from this cold and asthma, I have eaten myself to oblivion.  I've been eating the food that he is rejecting.  He is rejecting because it physically hurts him.  I don't reject it because I am afraid for him.  I fear that I made a bad decision in choosing this procedure.  I know it can help him, and he is okay, but I am still fearful of the "what ifs" that I don't have control over. 

I dropped the baby off at daycare and I went to Target to purchase Women Food And God.  I am not usually one to fall onto a band wagon; even if it is one recommended by my idol, Oprah.  But something compelled me to go.  I also locked the episode on my DVR so I can go back to it and refer to the other women I saw featured.

There has been so many bloggers talking about their recent binges and feeling powerless over food, maybe this can help me and others to figure out what the triggers are and manage not to eat because of emotional hunger.  It can't hurt.