Veggie Life . . .

We decided to get a share of our community supported agriculture back in June.  I've been trying to incorporate all of the veggies that we are given in our box in our daily meals.  It is hard to be creative.  However, I am making a lot of colorful salads, sauteed and roasted veggies.  It is lovely. 

The downfall is not knowing what to do with some of the veggies because I can't figure out more ways to eat beets, and my healthy eating goals limits my ability to make a beet cake.  If you have any tips for beets, please send them my way. 

My Toy . . .

This morning when I hopped on the treadmill for a 20 minute run for my 5K speed training, I discovered that my son had been tearing at the padding on the handle of the treadmill.  I was devastated.  I felt like a kid whose toy doll was de-limbed by some terrible little boy with a Mohawk.  This wasn't a tear that had just happened, it is one that he has been consistently chipping away at.  If you notice the picture of the treadmill, the frontward handle was chipped away many years ago and duck taped.  The other one was intact.  Well now the second handle has to be wrapped in black duck tape too . . . and I ain't happy.  

There are very few things that I own that bring me a modicum of joy.  The treadmill is one.  Hubby bought it shortly after we got married because he had these grand plans of getting back in shape while watching TV.  He took months of research and review.  We went to countless stores.  And he ultimately bought it online.  It was a heavy treadmill to carry to our apartment and put together.  After he found the right spot he started his workout.  Then stopped.  I then started exercising on it thereafter because it was just standing there unwanted.  It became my toy.  I wanted it.  I made sure to maintain it and use it.  I can count on both hands and both feet how many times hubby has used it.  12.  Yes, 12.  We've had it almost 11 years.  

This treadmill has moved with us about 6 times in those 11 years and has been a faithful companion.  So to have it marred was upsetting.  Okay, it is just a treadmill, but this treadmill gives me motivation to run.  I trained for my first 5K with this treadmill.  I plan to keep training and exceeding my fitness goals.  It is a great machine.  And it is mine.  All mine.  

So that little boy with the mohawk has been warned that if he touches it again, his head will be shaved and he will be sent off to military school. 

Rock Bottom . . .

I hit rock bottom on Sunday, July 4th.  It has been the rock bottom that I needed like when I was in college.  We were invited to a pool party.  I was there with the three kids and hubby.  I was wearing a black skirt with a compression garment built in (it is an amazing skirt) and a long top to cover my muffins.  I thought I looked cute with my curls and clothes.  But then I saw them . . . the other moms in their bikinis.  There were a couple of women in their 40s that physically looked like they were in their 20s. The women in their 30s (like me), fabulous too and each had given birth to 2 kids.  I know one of the 30+ year old is a mom of two and she exercises . . . a lot. 

For all the exercise I do, I don't see the results.  Sure my legs are strong and my calves are muscular, but they're riddled with cellulite and chunk . . . in the trunk.  My belly is a gelatinous flab that is wide rather than bulbous.  I was not a happy gal.  I wasn't dressed for the occasion.  I didn't feel confident in my looks.  I wasn't strutting my stuff. So that rock bottom of seeing toned and muscular Moms in a two piece made me want that.  Want it so bad that I am taking this eating thing more seriously so I can see the results of the morning runs and spin bike sessions. 

I have been running and spinning since Sunday, and I've cut back on my overeating.  I made a healthy lunch of chickpeas in a curry with barley cooked in stock and broccoli for today.  I am incorporating more vegetarian meals into my diet because the first time I lost a tremendous amount of weight it was all vegetarian.  I need a healthy balance now that I am 4 years away from my 40s.

The goal is to go on our Christmas vacation with a two piece in my suitcase, and I don't want to be insecure about wearing it around the other fit moms who attend that trip too. 

Have you ever hit rock bottom that shook you to weight loss?  If so, what was it?  And how are you working toward never seeing rock bottom again?

Re-Training . . .

I started re-training for a 5K that is in October.  This would be the same event that I ran in October of '09 when I got serious about fitness.  I ran the 5K in 40:37.  When I finished running and spoke to another finisher, she told me that it will be nice to compare my time in a year and see how I improve.  And that is just what I plan to do.

I intend to run the race in October.  After reading an article and speed program in Fitness this month, I realized that I could absolutely increase my speed.  I run on a treadmill primarily, and while it is significantly different than running on terrain, I know that I can do the program and see a faster pace in the race.  My goal is to run 3.1 miles in 36 minutes.  That would be a pace of 12 minutes.  Yikes!

Today, I started week one of the program, but will repeat week one next week.  It said to do 15-25 minutes of an "easy run", which is my normal pace.  But it also required me to push my speed for at least the last 5 minutes.  I pumped up some Black Eyed Peas and ran for 5 minutes at 5.0 mph; 12 minute mile.  I'd never done that before.  While I have run 6.0 mph, I called that my sprint.  Yes, I'm slow.  While it isn't super fast, it is a big difference for me.  So my goal is to exceed the 12 minute mile on the treadmill and outdoors. 

I hope to take the training outdoors at least once a week when hubby can stay home with the kids.  Early morning runs are now in nice bright sunlight, so I am no longer fearful of running outdoors.  

How is your summer fitness plan going?  Do you find yourself exercising indoors, if so what do you do?  Or have you branched outdoors? What is your outdoor fitness activity?

Summer Challenge . . .

I started my fitness focus Summer of 2009.  It started with my goal to run a 5K in October of 2009.  I've not run often in the last two months.  I decided to re-train for the same 5K, which is on October 30th.  I am excited to get back into a challenge. But the training that works my heart and strengthens my lower body isn't enough for my body to maintain overall strength and stamina.  I decided to start an upper body challenge because I failed my last arm challenge . . . miserably. 

I took my test for the 100 Pushup training program.  I only did 4 standard pushups.  I am sure I could do more modified pushups, but my goal is to be able to bang out 100 pushups at once.  I love feeling strong.  I hope to really make my upper body stronger and leaner.  I will also be including Yoga in the very near future, which fell to the wayside these last few months.  And I can't say enough that I do love Yoga, and it will be a big part of my life again.

I can't guarantee that I am back on the fitness wagon, but I am enjoying getting up and putting in at least 45 minutes to an hour of cardio.  Today, I did 50 minutes on my spin cycle while watching a streaming video from Netflix.  I am watching the first season of Firefly.  It is an old show that didn't last a complete season, but anything that is keeping me motivated and excited to get on the treadmill is fantastic. 

So Next week, I am doing week one of 100 pushups, running 3-4 times a week, cycling 2-3 times a week; hopefully walking with my colleague at work.  She is my pedometer pal.  I need to exercise to keep my stress level down.  I am in the midst of a ton of work at the office and I can't seem to manage the summer sports with our son.  I feel like I am running like a chicken with its head cut off.  Exercise keeps my stress down.

I am also trying the Line Diet.  I am hoping that my need for visualizing and tracking my progress will make this easier.  Research it and let me know if this would work for you. 

Do you have any goals for the summer to keep you challenged and motivated?  If so, what is it?  How have you planned for it?  What is the number one thing you need to happen in order to do and complete your challenge?

Salmon over greens

I am trying to eat as much of my CSA share before I have to pick up on Monday.  That means a lot of veggies with 2 out of 3 meals.  I forgot how simple lunch can be and that it will satisfy me just as much as having a protein, a simple carb, and veggies.  And it doesn't have to be a huge production. 

In a cast iron skillet, I grilled the salmon on both sides with a touch of olive oil with salt and pepper.  I put in the oven for about 7 more minutes to cook through.

In the meantime, in an aluminum skillet, I started to cook garlic in olive on low heat.  Put the green beans to start cooking.  Tossed.  Put the spinach to cook.  Added salt and pepper to taste.

Once spinach wilted, I plated the greens in the center of the plate and put the salmon on top.  Then I put a vinagrette over the salmon and greens for a crisp and clean taste.  The vinagrette was blended with white wine, olive oil, salt, pepper, and mustard.  Yum!

I am going to try to make more healthy meals and take photos for the blog.  They may not be anywhere near as good as Pioneer Woman, but I like to share what I make and eat. 

All or nothing . . .

When I take on new hobbies or interests, I go into it with an "all or nothing" attitude.  I find myself obsessing over that particular subject matter--my boy has inherited this from me.  When I started knitting, I got as many books, needles, patterns and yarn as I could.  When I started spinning my own yarn, I needed to start off learning through simple means, then buying a spinning wheel, and exploring the intricate nature of spinning yarn, and dyeing it, then knitting some more.  Because I had a blog, I wanted to take better pictures, so I went full force with photography books from the library to learn how to best use my point and shoot camera.  When the point and shoot was no longer sufficient, I had to get a top of the line DSLR--it didn't matter that I couldn't afford it (or the lenses) . . . it was all or nothing, right?  Then my need to make a quilt for each of my babies.  Yeah, that stopped at 2 quilts and both were for one baby.  Recently, it was reclaiming thrifted furniture to refinish and redecorate my home; all the furniture is sitting in the basement waiting till I make the time.  Once I've achieved my goal of learning a subject, I get bored and I move onto something else.  However, that means I dump the previous projects and barely consider it again.  They are all piled up in the basement.

When I started running (so I could complete a 5K in Fall of 2009), I went full force.  I created my own version of C25K.  I got up at 5 a.m. to run on the treadmill.  When race day approached four months later, I got a babysitter and ran my race. Nothing could stop me. I was so proud.  I made many goals of maintaining my new exercise "obsession".  It's been a year since I started training for that first 5K.  Since then I ran another one in January of 2010, with the hopes of running a race every month in 2010.  That stopped short after experiencing my first race in Wisconsin's wintery conditions.  And then I started letting my 5 a.m. workouts slip from at least 5 x a week to 3.  Then they became very inconsistent to none existent.  The same has occurred with Yoga and Jillian Michael's DVDs.  

I had many lofty goals when I started this journey (including consistent blogging) and I've let those goals lapse . . . often.  I have improved on many things, but that "obsession" and need to master something is gone.  I no longer knit, spin, take pictures like I used to, or quilt.  I don't run as much, if at all lately.  I am taking more liberties in the eating-of-crap department. I just don't want to commit . . . to fail. 

Part of me wants a solution to "why I do that?"  I do know why I do it, but I want a solution.  How do I fix me?  I am quite sure it is adult ADHD.  I can't complete things.  I can start a book and never finish it.  I can start a project and let it linger . . . for years.  I can set off to run and bike for fitness, but never lose a pound which was the intended purpose.  And I am struggling with how to change this mindset.  I want to do all of those things that I've mastered and loved (at the time), and finish something, then move on.  I want to go back and forth with multiple things and never give up until complete, but I want to continue doing those projects or exercise that I enjoy without terminating the activity forever.  And I want to learn how to do all this without taking medication like the commercials advertise.  I also don't want to see a therapist to work through it all.

I have decided to put all those activities on a schedule or "to do" list.  I need to schedule the time to start, work through, and finish an activity.  I don't want to let the projects pile up and feel guilt for never finishing and never returning to it. I also need to learn to just let some of those old, not completed projects go.  Find them better homes through donations.  I am sure that my lack of weight loss has a lot to do with not really wanting to see the results of my hard efforts.  I am not sure if I want to see my body at the final stages of this lifestyle change.  I don't want to see failure (that is  loose skin or stretch marks) after putting in the time and effort in exercise and eating well.  I don't want to be disappointed in seeing the damage of all of those years of obesity and pregnancies.  So when it comes to weight loss, this "all or nothing" means that if I don't get my all (slimmer, tighter and fit figure), then I want nothing (flab and stretch marks).   And I must find a way to lose this attitude because what I gain from this loss of weight is health, longevity, fitness, easier breathing without meds, and a higher degree of happiness than when I started.

Do you have an "all or nothing" attitude?  If so, how have you worked through overcoming it?